Black Love

I keep hearing our folks describe Barack and Michelle’s relationship as “True Black Love or how a real Black man treats his woman” and women cheer and say “that is how a man’s suppose to love his woman” almost as though they created something that never existed. Somehow, I find it very strange that we have missed the shining examples that put before us in the past, well okay, they were not the first Lady and the first black President, but they were there all along. Now, I do not want the naysayers to come a calling, I respect the Obama’s, embrace their strong presence in many of our young children’s lives, voted for him once and will be willing to pull the lever in his favor in another four years as well. (Cause it sure is gonna take more than four years to clean up George’s mess) So best believe I am first in line to give them the dap that they deserve, but let us not forget the visions of black love that have enriched, and sustained many of us for years.

What about loving relationships like Ruby Dee and Ossie Davis, married for 56 years they shared a relationship based on mutual admiration and pride. On the other hand, Dr. Martin Luther King and Coretta Scott who married in 1953 and despite his death she remained dedicated and committed to their vow of love. What about the Washingtons you know Denzel and Paulette, or the Smith’s, Will and Jada. Yeah black folks Michelle and Barack do not have the true black love on lock down but just have put it back in the spotlight for many of those who have forgotten.

Many of us see true black love every day and just over look it, I see it in my friends Gerry and Deborah, they have been married twenty-one years raised three of their own children and one god child. To my knowledge, he had never laid a hand on her and has always had us women-friends “wondering where we could get a carbon copy of him”. I could think of my girlfriend Robin and her husband Phil, they have been married for 9 years, and are raising their four daughters three of which they adopted in a loving God-fearing environment, or maybe we can look at my husband’s sister and brother in law Marsha and Lionel who have been married for over twenty-five years and although they do not have children have played a substantial role in raising many of their nieces and nephews as well as other’s children. Finally, my grandparents Matthew and Gabrella who were childhood sweethearts and after marrying other’s found their way back to each other and spent 53 years in a deeply loving relationship that encourage each of them even as he laid dying in the hospital.

So this year as we head into Valentine’s Day let’s not just celebrate the what many are proclaiming to be something new but let’s search our lives and begin to recognize those who may never have the spotlight on their love but are dedicated just the same in their commitment to one another. Do not allow Michelle and Barack’s display of love to have the lock on “Black-love” but, allow it to be just another glance at the type of love many of us see and overlook in our daily lives.